Home Sick.

I am at home, literally sick. And I am home-sick. Mmm. Fun. I decided I am going to write a blog about everything I miss. Ramble on and on about what I miss. And then, I'm going to get over it. This is my choice and I love it here. It's pointless spending the 4 months I have here sitting around, moping. I need to get it out and get over it. Sure, I will still miss it. But, I won't sit around moping all of the time.

I miss:

• Mom
• Dad
• Alyssa/Chad
• Melodie
• Zachary
• Stephanie
• Extended Family
• Friends
• Church Family
• Snow
• Falcon High School
• My animals
• Waking up in my bed at night knowing Stephanie is right there.
• Having my family (Stephanie included) to joke around with/talk to all of the time.
• Dinnertime with 6 people.
• Playing cribbage with my dad.
• Playing World of Warcraft (yes, I'ma nerd) with my brother.
• Taking pictures with Melodie.
• Listening to sermons with Stephanie.
• Turning on light switches and having a light turn on.
• Mountains.
• Playing my guitar.
• Telling people that they have to wait until the second "Sage Crest" to turn.
• Being able to hang out with my friends.
• Having friends that live in the same state as me.
• Getting piercings with "the girls"
• Dates with my dad.
• My mom nurturing me when I am sick.
• UFC nights with my family.
• Having free roam of Stephanie's clothes. ;)
• Feeding my horse every morning and night.
• Snuggling on the couch to watch movies.
• Family game nights.
• Sleeping through the night.
• Sleeping in on weekends.
• Doing yard work.
• Late nights at Kim's house with her and the kiddos.
• Walking to the Angier's after work.
• Hanging out with Cassi.
• Seeing Morgan Child at theDistrict and talking about "good old times"
• Going on missions trips with the church.
• Talking to Lisa and Aly at lunch at school.
• Shopping with the "girls"
• Sylvan Learning Center.
• Having a job.
• Blankets and drowning up under them.
• Late nights at Audrey's with Audrey, Becca, Chris, Aaron, Wooree, Stephanie, Melodie, Josh, and anyone else who wanted to join.
• Riding horses to a friend's house.
• Smiling when I see Facebook posts that I was involved in.
• Riding horses with Kaylee, Nicole, and Starla.
• Going to theDistrict to see all my friends and learn more about God.
• Meeting with the youth group on Sunday nights.
• Worship with Meridian Point Church.
• Volunteering at the MPC.
• Weekends (or weeks!) at the Livingston's house.
• Boba.
• Listening to Alyssa sing on Sunday mornings and being proud of who she's become.
• Being a part of family events.
• Seeing Melodie and Chris so happy together.
• Friends that I had just been getting to know.
• Using the dishwasher.
• Baking.
• Cleaning the house with music blasted.
• Certain friends at Falcon that would brighten my days.
• Being a student aid to Stacey Warren.
• Having a schedule.
• Food with sugar.
• Helping Zach with his math homework.
• Bible verses in my shower.
• Watching The Office with Mel, Stephanie, and Zach.
• Having movie or Killer Bunny nights and Nate and Anastasia's.
• Babysitting Christopher, Aaron, and Timothy.
• Dad helping me with all of my computer problems.
• Waking up or coming home to little notes from Stephanie.
• Being able to drive mom around town.
• Learning how to drive stick shift with my dad.
• Being cold.
• Creating inside jokes that no one understood.
• Prayers with the "group" at Audrey's.
• Meeting all of the people that came to my house for hair cuts.
• Washing dishes with a sponge.
• Vaccuuming.
• Being able to go to the doctor.
• Preparing, eating, AND cleaning with everyone in my family.
• Visits from Alyssa and Chad and hearing about what's been going on with them.
• Buying skinnies for my little brother without my mom knowing. ;)
• Stairs in my house.
• Watching Biggest Loser with the family.
• Asking Alyssa to proof-read my papers.
• Being able to have coffee with people and speak in person.
• Concerts with my friends.
• My friends at theDistrict.
• Sharing old memories.
• Being reminded of my "i love you paper" by Faith.
• Playing guitar with Nick Mayer.
• Runnning through the streets of downtown with "the group"
• The kids of Meridian Point Church.
• The students at Sylvan Learning Center.
• The staff at Sylvan Learning Center.
• Watching scary movies with the Yenters.
• Seeing my friends from Ozark when they come down to visit.
• Probably more than I'm even writing down.
• Not being so alone.
• Being "in the loop" with what was going on
• Home.

I dislike:

• Not being able to go to senior activities.
• Not being able to see baby kittens and watch them grow up.
• Not being able to train my horse before I go off to college.
• Not being able to hang out with my sisters whenever I feel like it.
• Having to dial 7-1-9 in front of just about every number I call.
• Being in a school where I don't learn anything.
• Waking up in the mornings thinking that there will be green walls and Stephanie will be there.
• Staying up late thinking about all of the things/people I miss.
• Not having anything I need at my fingertips (fingernail clippers, needle and thread, radio, etc)
• Not being a part of the stories that are being created within my family.
• Not wearing hoodies because it's so warm.
• Not bring able to wear the colors blue, red, and green to school.
• Not being able to bring a backpack to school.
• Having to figure out what time it is somewhere else so that I know if I can call.
• Not being able to do P90X with the girls.
• Missing four months of Melodie and Zachary growing up that I won't be able to get back.
• Having to tell people that my hair stylists lives in Colorado when they ask.
• Not knowing my way around.
• Feeling so alone.
• Missing everything/everyone so much that it hurts.

And now... I'm going to get over it. Sure, I'll still miss it. I'll still miss things and people. But, I'm going to move on with my life because moping around all of the time is ridiculous. I miss you guys. A lot.

My prayer is that I will learn to love what I have here more than I miss my home. This is the life God has chosen for me and I love it. I'm just too busy relying on how much I miss home. So, I'll miss it. But I'm not going to live my life revolved around how much I miss it.

The End. (My next blog will not be so depressing. I just needed to get it out.)